The Bullying Doctor

Performing can feel like a bullying situation too!
Some musicians cope well with and welcome public performance. But some dread performing and this dread seriously detracts from their pleasure. Clearly what’s needed is to know what skills the first group has that aid their enjoyment, and to take those specific skills and offer them to the second!
It will come as no surprise to most musicians that the anxiety they feel about performing translates into the physical tensions that hinder the very thing they want most – to perform with ease and confidence. Until recently most focus has been on encouraging students simply to ‘work harder’ so that a near-faultless performance ensues ‘despite nerves’. But with fear comes stress and this stress means that our muscles tense up, our breathing becomes shallow, and our hearts race. We are, quite literally, unable to perform well. There are excellent disciplines that challenge this physical tension and aid relaxation, such as Alexander Technique. Similarly, The Lovegrove Approach actively challenges the personal psychological tensions that underlie physical tension. Because whilst relaxing our bodies is of course the ultimate aim, research shows that personal relaxation is greatly supported by high self-esteem and an ability to empathise with others.
Using videos and games, students are given the information they need to aid their motivation to re-train thoughts into more useful patterns. Starting with easy exercises that increase confidence, the ultimate aim is for all students to perform at a final concert feeling that they have done their very best and are able to observe and enjoy the positive effect that this has had on their audience.
Most therapeutic help deals solely with the performer. There is often little recognition that a performance consists of not one but two entities – the performer and the audience! The Lovegrove Approach also encourages performers to look at the interaction between these two and to use this knowledge, and specific social skills, to engage with their audience in ways that enhance this interaction in positive and life-affirming ways.
The aim is for students to take away with them the knowledge of what happens physically and psychologically in performance. And to then use the confidence skills they have been offered to challenge present negative patterns and change them into the positive ones that translate into better experiences both for them as performers, and for us as the audience.
Feedback:
“I’ve been terrified all my life of playing in front of people. This course made me realise why and gave me the skills to change it. I’ve just performed as lead violin at a major concert and it was fantastic to end up elated instead of the usual disappointment that I hadn’t done my best because I was nervous.”
“I always wondered why people who were less able than me still seemed to get further than me. Now I know that it’s their confidence that makes the difference and I’m determined to work on mine so that I become the performer I want to be.”
"I've always felt bullied just by being with other, better players, and what I thought would be very critical audiences. Now I understand we're all working together to share what's really important - the music! The course helped me feel calm and much more confident."